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[nerdanel_the_wise]

[OOC: This piece is being used, but it is part of Path Not Taken. As Mary Anne absorbs the power of the tarot in small ways, she sees the paths, can see the various outcomes. This is NOT Millicanon. It is a VISION, and ONLY a VISION. It is a WHAT IF only thing. Nothing more. Námo and Nerdanel IC have no knowledge of these events. They weren't there for them, technically.]


The library is large, bright, full of windows and books. There are comfortable, worn chairs and sofas scattered around the room, and half-finished books left on the tables.

Nerdanel closes the door, taking Gabriel from Mary Anne, and looks beyond her to the tall, gangly youth that looked very much like her.

"Nelyo, please take Gabriel outside? Play with him?"

Maedhros smiles, accepting his brother into his arms, and after casting an interested look at the human, slips from the room while Gabriel yammers at him about the Bar.

Nerdanel sighs, leaning against a nearby table, and looks at Mary Anne. "Welcome to my home."

Comments

[song_tra_bong]

She swallows, almost nervously.

"I...I can try and talk to him. See if he can't leave things alone."

[namo]

He chuckles mirthlessly.

"Oh, and stop his fun? Why would we want that?"

[song_tra_bong]

Her lip curls.

"Because we both know he has a twisted sense of fun and I thought I'd try and spare you some of it if I could."

[namo]

"What? Does the Queen not understand the purpose? The new path placed before the Fool?"

He begins to stalk the room.

"To willingly bed the one who killed Gorlim, calling him by that one's name as you take what he offers because it hurts so much less than being alone with memories and dreams and wants... To do that with eyes purposefully shut while what amounts to a wedding band sits on your finger to mock oaths sworn... Tell me, O Wise One, what path is there that does not lead to the divorcement of that oath and the dissolution of the bonds that you wish would choke you but do not because the arms have never dared to hold you that tight?" he demands.

[song_tra_bong]

For a minute, she can't decide if she wants to cry or throw up.

Instead, she steps in front of him to block his path, eyes burning.

"I'm not the Queen yet, you asshole, but you're certainly in the running for the Fool if you keep this shit up. There might be some other path, but you're too fixated on wallowing in your pain to look for it. And I don't know. Not that and not anything--I'm flying blind here, but I want to help, and tearing me up one side and down the other is sure as hell not going to get you anywhere."

[namo]

He glares.

"Then what would you like for me to do or say?"

[song_tra_bong]

She rakes a hand through her hair.

"I don't know. But not yelling at me would be a start. I'm here because I care, dumbass."

And she even manages to make 'dumbass' sound affectionate.

[namo]

"I am not yelling. I rarely yell."

And it's true. He hasn't begun yelling yet.

"I love him and distance only hurts."

[song_tra_bong]

Mary Anne decides she would rather not ever see him yell.

"Of course it does."

("Love hurts like nothing else, sweet. Did no one tell you what you were getting into?")

She remembers the taste of Atlantean and takes his hand anyway.

[namo]

He looks at their hands.

"What stops me from giving up? From just taking an endless number of people into my bed to soothe the loneliness I find more acute at night?"

[song_tra_bong]

She's quiet for a moment.

"Nothing. Nothing but love."

[namo]

"Love did not stop me from taking him to bed, Mary Anne."

Now he tilts his head, looking at her oddly.

"Why does that not bother you? You love him."

Hey, it's obvious to Námo that those two love each other, though he can't understand why.

[song_tra_bong]

She turns a furious shade of pink and looks away.

"He...We haven't promised anything to each other. We're still...we're not exclusive."

Her free hand twitches, but she doesn't reach for her necklace.

[namo]

He smiles sadly.

"Promises are made to be broken anyway."

[song_tra_bong]

She manages not to flinch.

"Not all of them."

[namo]

His eyes shift in colour as pain moves through him.

"All of them."

[song_tra_bong]

She shakes her head.

(you will learn to keep your promises hold your tongue tell me his name amore hold your tongue silence silent as the grave you will prove your honor and keep your word even as you die choking on it)

Her grip on his hand tightens, but she doesn't speak.

[namo]

He pulls her against him suddenly, looking down into her face.

"Promise broken. Would it be any worse to break it again?" he asks softly.

[song_tra_bong]

She stares up at him, lips parted slightly in shock.

"What do you think?"

She could step away if she tried. She doesn't.

[namo]

Because she doesn't pull away, he doesn't let her go.

"I think I have done to worst I could have."

He dips his head to her lips, kissing her softly.

[song_tra_bong]

he is not yours

and I will not keep him

Her hands settle on his hips as she kisses him back.

[namo]

His hands move lower on her back, over her hips. She was slighter than the one he was accustomed to kissing and touching, but she was willing.

She was here.

He presses himself to her, his eyes closed as he kisses and explores.

[song_tra_bong]

This is different and strange, not right but not wrong either, and more than enough to make her head spin.
guardi le stelle
he needs you
che tremano d'amore e di speranza
so stay

She lets her own hands wander up his sides, then trail slowly back down.

[namo]

His skin was cool. Weeks ago he'd stop caring about keeping his body warm like a human. Slowly, the creature Gorlim had woken into being was slipping away, back under the mask of a god.

He thrusts his tongue a little deeper into her mouth and slides his hands under her shirt. Only once had he shared himself with a woman -- his wife -- and this was still new. But it wasn't so foreign that he couldn't understand what to do. Pleasure was pleasure, no matter the gender of partner, and that's what he sought now with Mary Anne in his arms.

Pleasure and lustful oblivion.

Remorse could be saved for a later date.

[song_tra_bong]

She had gone to Ruin to forget.

And he had come to her.

It's a thing she understands.

She moans into the kiss, nails raking lightly on his sides as she presses herself closer.